life!

life been pretty crazy this year and last year!! it kinda sucks!!!! i dont want to grow up cuz growin up sucks!! i hate all the drama and people dieing and its like omg!!!! but ya.... well i learned my lesson today that i should listin to my parents more often lol cuz the other day my parents told me to listen to them and they where like you always dont get to do what you want to do and any ways your to young to do all this stuff and i just kept tellin them well all my other friends get to do it so y cant i and then they where like cuz your the oldest and there the youngest in there family so thats y.... and i just got so mad at them so bad!! and then today i kept thinking to myself like geese i should listin to my parents more cuz they onely care about me so thats y they are saying that... i mean they dont want nothing to happin to me... but sometims i think they just dont want to let me grow up yet cuz they still call me a child and every thing and i just kept thinking maby i should just wait on every thing maby i should listin to them maby i should do what they say... maby i should do a whole bunch to impress people becasue im just an idiot!! and im not smart and thats just how i get in trouble alot.... and its not right at all!!! and i feel really bad!!! and i just have like a ton going threw my mind and its killing me inside!! i think i just need some help cuz im just mental!!!!! ha ha.... well ya my life sucks and i dont NOT!!! want to grow up yet!! not one bit!!!!! not at all!!!! ugh!!!! life life life it just sucks so bad!!! i hate beeing a teen it sucks butt!!! you have no idea!!!!!! ha ha